#dallas cowboys
Satirical news articles about the Dallas Cowboys. Explore parody reports and humorous updates on the team, players, and season
Sources Confirm Cowboys Player's Blood Flowed Within Appropriate Vessel Parameters
League Insiders Are Now Sifting Through the Highly Classified Arterial Data for Any Competitive Advantage or Existential Threat.
Country pauses to remember man behind revolutionary shotgun formation
The passing of John Fitzgerald prompts a national debate on the long-term societal impact of players who simply hand the ball to others.
Cowboys Clinch Simulated Dynasty with Unprecedented Mock Draft Trade
Team Officials Confirm Several Virtual Championships Already in the Books Following Groundbreaking Hypothetical Moves.
Cowboys' Entire Draft Strategy Revealed as 'Maximize Fan Speculation'
The Team's Front Office Has Reportedly Shifted Resources from Scouting to Advanced Rumor Propagation Algorithms.
Player Faces 'Horrifying' Prospect of Being 'Forcefed' $111M Contract
The Dallas Cowboys' Aggressive Offer Has Reportedly Presented Wide Receiver George Pickens with a Dilemma so Acute It Threatens to Derail His Entire Offseason.
Receiver Faces Agonizing Choice: Trade or 'Crippling' $111 Million Payout
Sources Indicate the Pittsburgh Steelers Wideout May Be Forced to Endure a Nine-Figure Sum if a Trade with Dallas Falls Through.
NFL Star's 'Humble Gray Lion' to Teach Kids the Optimal Market Value of Humility
A Dallas Cowboys Spokesperson Confirmed the Book Will Offer Actionable Strategies for Children to Monetize Internal Fortitude.
