#public safety
Aggregates satirical news and humor on public safety issues. Explores the lighter side of community security, policing, and policy discussions.
Boston Bartenders Warn Extending World Cup Hours Risks City's Structural Integrity
Service Industry Fears Any Further Alcohol Intake Could Cause Entire Metropolitan Area to Spontaneously Become a Bar Fight.
Authorities Praise Swift Action Preventing Critical Pop Culture Incident
Prevention Hailed as a Win for National Spirit and the Unwavering Joy of Millions, Setting a Precedent for Protecting Cultural Narratives.
Experts Warn 'Outside' May Contain 'Weather' Throughout the Day
Officials Urge Public to Brace for Unprecedented Atmospheric Conditions That Are Exactly Like Conditions From Last Week.
Texas Agencies Brace for 'Unregulated Spontaneous Celebration' During World Cup
Officials Cite Potential for Unsanctioned Cheering and Unmonitored Cultural Exchange as Primary Security Concerns.
Rabid Bat's 'Unilateral' Hephzibah Bite Triggers Emergency Federal Task Force
Experts Warn of Potential 'Inter-Species' Conflict, Urge Citizens to Reconsider All Previous Assumptions About Flying Mammals.
Police Laud Decisive Action After Toy Gun Confiscated From Park.
Authorities Confirm No Casualties Reported in Incident Involving "Projectile-Launching Recreational Device."
Government Announces $300m Initiative to Make Toy Guns Look Less Like Guns
Program Aims to Redesign Children's Playthings Into 'Non-Threatening, Abstract Concept-Representation Devices.'
I Am the Storm Alert and I'm Sick of Being Ignored
You Think You Know Me, but You Only See the Tip of the Radar. My Existence Is a Constant Battle Against Human Complacency.
National Guard Deployed to Manage Pokémon GO "Tinkatink" Event Crowds
Federal Agencies Activate Contingency Plans Amidst Fears of Widespread Economic Disruption and Infrastructure Strain from Upcoming Mobile Game Phenomenon.
Emerald Isle Hails 'Monumental Success' After 6-Month Coyote Initiative Removes Three
The Ambitious, Multi-Agency Effort, Costing Taxpayers an Estimated $1.2 Million, Has Reportedly Restored Tranquility to Local Beaches.
