#climate change

Environmental Scientists Identify Global Corporations and Climate Change as Primary Threats, Baffling Sports Pundits Still Fixated on the Nhl.

This Advisory, Previously Reserved for Minor Inconveniences, Now Implicitly Includes a Shrug Emoji for Impending Apocalyptic Thunderstorms.

Developers Eye Prime Real Estate as Global Warming Inadvertently Creates Exclusive, Pre-Chilled Locales, Promising Carbon-Negative Oblivion.

Officials Hail ‘perfect Beach Weather’ as Region Accelerates Towards Becoming a Subtropical Venice.

Experts Urge Continued Distraction Through Celestial Observation as Global Crises Escalate Unchecked.

Experts Are Reportedly Drafting a Follow-Up Investigation Into Whether Water Is, in Fact, Wet.

Local Officials Confirm New Economic Development Strategy Focuses on Making the Area a Premier 'Natural Disaster Destination.'

If Your Wardrobe Is Perpetually Confused and Your Pet Gives You Side-Eye, You Might Be a Subject in the Atmosphere's Grand Social Experiment.

Tech Titan Announces 'Optimized Prosperity Initiative,' Promising a Trickle-Down Deluge of Innovation If Fewer, Wealthier Individuals Control Global Assets.

Citing Unprecedented Comfort and Lower Heating Bills, a Coalition of Local Homeowners Is Suing the State for Failing to Codify Mild Winters Into Law.

Our practice of bestowing human monikers on powerful storms is inviting their wrath, and it's time we stopped.

It's time we stopped interfering with nature's most self-aware creatures and respected their bold evolutionary leap.

Citizens Encouraged to Perform Optimal Happiness Rituals Before Seasonal – and Existential – Reckoning.

Industry leaders move to reclassify extreme weather events as predictable, allowing for new premium adjustments and claim limitations.

A press release distributed via fax this morning reports that the National Institute of Rhetorical Physics (NIRP) has confirmed a localized, planet-sized vacuum generated during a recent State of the Union address, which expunged all mentions of climate change. Further studies are underway to determine the vacuum's dimensions and effects, with detection protocols under development.

A Single Polar Bear Thought a 427-Mile Swim Was a Challenge; I Saw It as Just Another Tuesday.

A Leading Conservative Institute Announced the Arduous Journey Proves Animals Thrive when Forced to Innovate.

Wealthy Nature Enthusiasts Eager to Catalog Species before Their Habitats Are Subsumed by a Warming Planet.

Researchers Suggest Further Investigation into Whether Water Is, in Fact, Wet.

A New €2.7 Billion Initiative Will Ensure Future Generations Can Still Instagram the Crumbling Remnants of a Civilization that Didn't See It Coming.

Local Meteorologists Encourage Residents to “Make the Most” of Temperatures 20 Degrees Above Average.

A Newly Formed Municipal Task Force Reassures Residents that Perpetual Oven-Like Conditions Are Simply "Part of the New Normal."

The Technology Promises Record Yields Even as Environmental Conditions Deteriorate Exponentially.

New Research Shows Root Systems Are Rapidly Evolving to Unpredictable Temperatures, a Strategy Not yet Observed in Human Legislative Bodies.

Studio Executives Confirm the Adaptation of Octavia E. Butler's Dystopian Classic Is Not at All Based on Current Events or Societal Trends.