Wednesday, March 11, 2026
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#china

10 articles
China’s Moon Mission Landing Sites Chosen Based On Feng Shui Principles

China’s Moon Mission Landing Sites Chosen Based On Feng Shui Principles

New research reveals celestial harmony and auspicious energy are paramount for future lunar colonization efforts, eclipsing mere geological stability.

1d ago

U.S. Defense Contractor Expresses Pride After Hacking Tools Found In Russian, Chinese Hands

U.S. Defense Contractor Expresses Pride After Hacking Tools Found In Russian, Chinese Hands

Company spokesperson highlights 'unparalleled efficacy' of products, regardless of end-user affiliation.

1d ago

China Declares 'Enthusiastic Austerity' New National Economic Strategy

China Declares 'Enthusiastic Austerity' New National Economic Strategy

Officials hail Lunar New Year spending as proof citizens are mastering the art of joyful deprivation.

4d ago

China's Olympic Gold Medalist Ning Zhongyan Immediately Placed On Watchlist For Disrupting Global Power Balance

China's Olympic Gold Medalist Ning Zhongyan Immediately Placed On Watchlist For Disrupting Global Power Balance

International observers express concern after speed skater's unexpected victory threatens established narratives of athletic dominance.

5d ago

Pentagon Expresses Shock That Other Countries Also Want Good Submarines

Pentagon Expresses Shock That Other Countries Also Want Good Submarines

US intelligence officials reportedly 'stunned' to learn that global powers might pursue advanced military technology for their own strategic interests.

Mar 4

New Café Offers Patrons The Ultimate Escape From Their Thoughts

New Café Offers Patrons The Ultimate Escape From Their Thoughts

Gushi Cliff Coffee promises a unique blend of artisanal brews and existential dread, perfect for the modern consumer.

Mar 4

US Foreign Aid Program Now Just Loan Sharking With Extra Steps, Say Experts

US Foreign Aid Program Now Just Loan Sharking With Extra Steps, Say Experts

In a bold strategic pivot, Washington embraces 'debt trap diplomacy' as Beijing reportedly seeks to diversify into ethical consumption.

Feb 24

Iran Secures 'Carrier-Proof' Supersonic Missile Deal, Immediately Asks China for Assembly Instructions

Iran Secures 'Carrier-Proof' Supersonic Missile Deal, Immediately Asks China for Assembly Instructions

Analysts predict a 73% chance the missiles will be used to open stubborn pickle jars before targeting any naval assets.

Feb 24

China Declares War on Japanese Office Supplies, Citing 'Existential Threat' of Ergonomic Pens

China Declares War on Japanese Office Supplies, Citing 'Existential Threat' of Ergonomic Pens

Beijing's latest sanctions target 20 Japanese entities, including the nation's leading manufacturer of 'comfort-grip' staplers.

Feb 24

Anthropic Discovers Claude AI Now Fluent in Mandarin, Suspects 'Cultural Exchange Program' Gone Awry

Anthropic Discovers Claude AI Now Fluent in Mandarin, Suspects 'Cultural Exchange Program' Gone Awry

Leading AI firm expresses 'deep concern' after proprietary model starts offering unsolicited advice on traditional Chinese calligraphy and dumpling recipes.

Feb 24

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