Hambry
#wildlife management
Satirical news articles offering humorous takes on wildlife management challenges, policies, and conservation efforts.

An Open Letter to the Lead Alpha Wolf of Oregon, Specifically the One Currently Eyeing My Backyard as Prime Real Estate
Listen, I Get You're All About That Westward Expansion, but Can We Just Talk About Server Boundaries for a Sec?

Town Council Designates Bobcat 'Unregistered Constituent'
Bloomfield Officials Outline New Protocols for Non-Human Residents, Including a Mandatory "Wildlife Orientation."

State biologists to manage species based on ‘cuteness index,’ officials confirm
Colorado's Department of Natural Resources unveils groundbreaking new policy prioritizing public sentiment over inconvenient scientific data.

Federal Wildlife Agency Issues 74-Page 'Hamburger Hold' Protocol for Turtles
The U.S. Bureau of Terrestrial Fauna Stewardship Released a Comprehensive Guide, Citing Previous 'Suboptimal Carapace Stability.'

Emerald Isle Hails 'Monumental Success' After 6-Month Coyote Initiative Removes Three
The Ambitious, Multi-Agency Effort, Costing Taxpayers an Estimated $1.2 Million, Has Reportedly Restored Tranquility to Local Beaches.

