LOS ANGELES – Sources close to pop superstar Rihanna confirm that her security apparatus is undergoing a significant strategic overhaul, transitioning from conventional bodyguards to a more 'future-proof' defense system. The move comes after a woman, Ivana Lisette Ortiz, was arrested for firing a weapon near the singer's Los Angeles residence, with bail subsequently set at a staggering $10 million.

“We’re no longer just looking for people who can take a bullet; we’re looking for people who can deflect a meteor,” stated a spokesperson for Fenty Global Security, speaking on condition of anonymity. “The threat matrix has evolved. It’s no longer just about disgruntled fans; it’s about the sheer, unadulterated passion of the internet manifesting physically. Our new hires need to be ready for anything from a rogue drone to a fan-fueled space-time anomaly.”

The job postings, discreetly circulated among elite defense contractors and sci-fi conventions, reportedly emphasize proficiency in advanced ballistics, psychological warfare against obsessive fandoms, and, critically, a working knowledge of 'non-terrestrial threat neutralization.' One alleged requirement listed 'demonstrable experience with energy-based weaponry, preferably orbital-class.'

Industry analysts suggest the $10 million bail for the alleged shooter, Ivana Lisette Ortiz, has set a new, albeit unofficial, benchmark for the perceived value of a celebrity’s personal space. This unprecedented valuation has reportedly prompted other high-profile individuals to re-evaluate their own security budgets, with many now considering a 'Rihanna-level' defense as the new gold standard.

Meanwhile, Rihanna herself is reportedly considering installing a force field that doubles as a Wi-Fi hotspot.