NEW YORK – The New York Times, long a bastion of rigorous journalism, announced today a new initiative to guide its readership through the increasingly complex labyrinth of modern sports consumption. Citing an urgent need to help subscribers locate specific college basketball games, the paper has begun publishing detailed, step-by-step instructions on how to access live broadcasts.

“Our readers trust us to explain the intricacies of global politics, economic policy, and the latest Michelin-starred restaurant openings,” stated Times Executive Editor, Eleanor Vance, from a press conference held in front of a large, unlit smart TV. “But we realized there was a glaring oversight: many simply don’t know how to turn on their TVs or navigate streaming menus. It’s a public service, really.”

The new guides, which include specific channel numbers and streaming app names, are reportedly the result of extensive internal research into reader habits. “We found a significant portion of our audience, while highly educated, struggles with basic interface design,” explained Dr. Aris Thorne, head of the Times' newly formed Department of Digital Leisure Accessibility. “They’re fluent in five languages but baffled by a Roku home screen.”

Future plans include tutorials on how to find the volume button and, eventually, a comprehensive guide to understanding basic sports rules for those who accidentally stumble upon a game.