THE ORBIT – The European Space Agency's (ESA) Jupiter Icy Moons Explorer (JUICE) probe, currently en route to the gas giant, has reportedly had its workload significantly expanded, now tasked with observing not just its primary targets but also Jupiter’s sprawling collection of 94 'minor' moons. Originally conceived to focus on the three scientifically significant icy moons – Ganymede, Europa, and Callisto – the probe will now be expected to at least nod in the direction of every single one of Jupiter’s celestial offspring.

“We understand the probe’s initial enthusiasm was for the big three, the charismatic mega-moons,” stated ESA spokesperson Dr. Elara Vance, adjusting her glasses. “But frankly, it’s just good manners. You can’t go to a family reunion and only talk to the successful cousins. JUICE needs to make eye contact with everyone, even the ones that are basically just glorified space rocks.”

The decision, outlined in a recent paper, suggests that while JUICE is meticulously mapping Ganymede’s magnetic field, it will also be performing a perfunctory flyby or a quick photographic sweep of the lesser-known satellites. “It’s about inclusivity,” added Dr. Vance. “Every moon deserves its moment, even if that moment is just a blurry snapshot from 500,000 kilometers away.”

Sources close to the mission, who spoke on condition of anonymity, described the probe as feeling “overwhelmed” and “a bit put upon.” One anonymous engineer noted, “We programmed it for deep dives, not speed dating. Now it’s basically going to be the space equivalent of liking every single one of your distant relatives’ vacation photos on Facebook.”

Scientists hope the probe can at least confirm that the 94 minor moons are, in fact, still there and haven't wandered off to join Saturn’s rings.