TEHRAN – Sources close to the leadership have confirmed that Iran’s presumptive next Supreme Leader, Mojtaba Khamenei, is fully prepared to continue his decades-long practice of governing without ever actually appearing in public. The move is seen as a bold commitment to stability, ensuring that the transition of power will be as imperceptible as his previous tenure.

“His Excellency’s dedication to the shadows is unparalleled,” stated Dr. Farzad Ahmadi, a political analyst who claims to have once seen a blurry photograph of a man who might have been Khamenei. “It’s a testament to his leadership that he can crush dissent, influence elections, and guide national policy without ever needing to endure the indignity of a public speech or a state dinner. True power, after all, is never seen, only felt.”

Critics suggest that this strategy might make it difficult for the populace to identify their leader, but proponents argue it fosters a deeper, more spiritual connection. “When you don’t know who your leader is, every powerful, unseen force becomes him,” explained one government official, who requested anonymity while speaking from behind a large potted plant. “It’s very efficient.”

Khamenei’s office, which also remains unconfirmed, reportedly issued a statement indicating his intention to continue influencing all major decisions while simultaneously not existing in any official capacity. The statement was delivered via a carrier pigeon that then immediately self-combusted.