LONDON — Chelsea FC, fresh off securing footballing siblings Lauren and Reece James to long-term contracts, has reportedly extended its commitment to the family by signing their mother, Mrs. Sarah James, to an unprecedented 26-year deal, ensuring her presence at Stamford Bridge until at least 2050.

The groundbreaking agreement, which includes performance-based bonuses for 'well-timed phone calls' and 'motivational text messages,' aims to lock in the familial stability Chelsea believes is crucial for future success. Sources close to the club indicate that Mrs. James's role will be largely advisory, focusing on 'holistic player well-being' and 'ensuring adequate snack provisions' for both the men's and women's teams.

“We’ve seen the incredible impact the James family has had on our club,” stated a Chelsea spokesperson, who wished to remain anonymous due to the sensitive nature of long-term maternal contracts. “It’s not just about their talent on the pitch; it’s the intangible support, the familial bond. We realized we couldn't just secure the players; we needed to secure the source of their unwavering commitment.”

While specific financial details were not disclosed, industry insiders suggest the deal includes a substantial 'Sunday Roast Clause' and a 'Holiday Travel Stipend' to ensure Mrs. James can continue her vital off-field duties without interruption. Critics, however, question whether this sets a precedent for clubs to start signing entire family trees.

Chelsea's next strategic move is rumored to involve acquiring the rights to the family’s favorite Sunday pub, just to be safe.