#animal shelters
Satirical news articles covering animal shelters. Humorous takes on pet adoption, shelter life, and animal welfare topics
Shelters Commend Nation for Impressive 'Voice for Animals' Day, Await Physical Adoptions
Animal Welfare Organizations Report a Record Number of Impassioned Social Media Posts, but Still Have Full Kennels.
Local Humane Society to Tackle Pet Crisis with Highly Competitive Improv Comedy
Experts Believe 'Whose Line Is It Anyway? (but for Strays)' Will Single-Handedly Solve Issues of Overpopulation and Abandonment.
Dallas Animal Services seeks 'community goodwill' to manage city's pet surplus
Citing unforeseen pet fecundity, city officials deputize residents to house backlog of furry responsibilities.
Dallas reclassifies shelter animals as "public infrastructure"
The move comes after record-breaking intake numbers left officials scrambling for a solution beyond "do your job."
States Achieve Breakthrough in Pet Population Control, Remain Baffled by Human Issues
Multi-State "Pawsitive Control Blitz" Hailed as Model for Tackling Problems that Don't Talk Back or Vote.
New Pet Drop-off Chute Aims to Streamline After-Hours Abandonments
Citing "Unacceptable Liability Risks" from Unorganized Nighttime Animal Deposits, Local Facility Pioneers Innovative Disposal Solution.
Shelters Struggle with Glut of 'Pre-Owned' Pandemic Emotional Support Animals
Local Animal Facilities Report a Market Crash in Companion Animal Enthusiasm, Leaving a Surplus of Previously Cherished Pets.
