SAN ANTONIO – The National Basketball Association announced a groundbreaking new rule today, effective immediately, requiring that Victor Wembanyama’s statistical output from his most recent game be formally read aloud by a court official prior to tip-off. The unprecedented mandate comes after the Spurs' phenom posted 32 points, 12 rebounds, eight assists, four blocks, and two steals in a single contest, prompting concerns about the psychological well-being of opposing teams.

“We believe this measure will help level the playing field, or at least prepare players for the inevitable,” stated NBA Commissioner Adam Silver in a press release that notably lacked his usual enthusiasm. “By confronting the sheer, unholy magnitude of his talent before the game, we hope to mitigate the mid-game existential crises that have become increasingly common.”

Sources close to the league indicated that several teams had formally requested a 'Wemby Warning' after players reported feeling 'statistically inadequate' and 'like animated GIFs of themselves trying to guard a skyscraper.' One anonymous coach reportedly submitted a formal complaint stating his team's morale was 'lower than a free throw percentage after a full 48 minutes of Wemby being Wemby.'

“It’s about transparency,” explained Dr. Evelyn Reed, a sports psychologist consulted by the league. “If you know you’re about to face a man who can block your shot from a different time zone, it’s better to process that information pre-emptively, rather than having it dawn on you mid-dunk attempt.”

The new rule also includes a provision for a mandatory 30-second 'gaze of awe' period, during which opponents must stare directly at Wembanyama, presumably to internalize the futility of their efforts. Critics suggest the league is simply formalizing a process that was already happening organically.