WASHINGTON D.C. – The U.S. Senate has officially sanctioned the use of artificial intelligence tools, including ChatGPT, for legislative work, a decision lauded by many as a bold step into the 21st century. However, sources close to the Capitol report that the first directive given to the newly approved AI was not to tackle inflation or international diplomacy, but to craft a bill making Tuesdays an optional workday for federal employees.

“We’re incredibly excited about the potential for AI to streamline our processes and enhance our ability to serve the American people,” stated Senator Mildred Albright (R-KY), admiring a printout of the AI's initial draft. “This isn’t about replacing human ingenuity; it’s about augmenting it. And frankly, Tuesdays have always been a bit of a drag.”

Critics, however, expressed concern that the Senate might be using cutting-edge technology for decidedly un-cutting-edge priorities. “I envisioned AI helping us analyze complex policy, not optimize personal leisure time,” remarked Dr. Evelyn Reed, a political science professor at Georgetown University. “It’s like giving a supercomputer to a toddler and expecting them to cure cancer instead of just drawing a really good dinosaur.”

Meanwhile, a spokesperson for the Senate Rules Committee confirmed that the AI is also reportedly working on a resolution to officially recognize 'nap time' as a legitimate legislative activity, citing 'optimal cognitive function' as the primary driver.