LAS VEGAS, NV – In a move that surprised absolutely no one with a passing familiarity with geography, the National Football League announced today that Super Bowl LXIII will once again be held at Allegiant Field in Las Vegas. The decision marks a bold continuation of the league’s strategy to utilize venues that are, by all accounts, already built and operational.

“After extensive deliberation and a rigorous internal process, we concluded that Las Vegas offers unparalleled convenience,” stated NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell in a press conference held via Zoom from his yacht. “The stadium is there. The hotels are there. The casinos are there. It really streamlines the planning when you don’t have to, you know, invent a new city every time.”

The announcement comes just months after Las Vegas successfully hosted Super Bowl LVIII, an event that reportedly generated significant revenue for both the league and local businesses. Critics, however, questioned the NFL’s commitment to exploring new horizons. “It’s like they just spun a globe, landed on Las Vegas, and said, ‘Eh, good enough for the next decade,’” remarked sports analyst Skip Bayless, who then immediately pivoted to an unrelated critique of LeBron James.

Allegiant Field management expressed enthusiasm for the repeat engagement. “We’re thrilled to once again welcome the Super Bowl,” said stadium operations director Brenda Finch, reportedly stifling a yawn. “Our staff is already intimately familiar with the layout, the concession stands, and precisely where to put all the expensive temporary signage. It’s almost like we’ve done this before.”

Sources close to the league suggest that future Super Bowl locations might also include 'wherever the last one was' and 'that one place with the big dome.'