WASHINGTON D.C. – Following recent high-profile memorial services, the National Association of Funeral Directors (NAFD) has announced that all future funerals will be officially recognized as legitimate, if unscheduled, venues for political discourse. The move comes after a series of eulogies that increasingly resembled stump speeches, culminating in former presidents using a civil rights icon's funeral to subtly (or not-so-subtly) critique current political figures.

“We understand that grieving is a process, and for many, that process now includes a deeply felt need to weigh in on the national conversation,” stated NAFD spokesperson, Brenda Croft. “Our members have been reporting a significant uptick in eulogies that pivot from fond reminiscences to policy platforms. It’s simply good business to adapt.”

The new guidelines suggest that funeral programs include a ‘Political Commentary’ section, and that eulogists be allotted specific time slots for both personal anecdotes and policy proposals. “We’re even considering a ‘lightning round’ for particularly contentious issues,” Croft added, noting that some families are already requesting a ‘fact-check’ table near the guestbook.

One anonymous funeral director noted, “It’s less about honoring the deceased and more about honoring the deceased’s potential as a political prop. We’ve had requests for ‘Make America Great Again’ flower arrangements and ‘Hope and Change’ themed catering. It’s a brave new world.”

Experts predict the trend will only accelerate, with future eulogies potentially featuring direct-to-camera appeals for campaign donations and endorsements for upcoming elections.