HOUSTON, TX – Local resident Karen Finch is reportedly seeking a formal apology and financial restitution from a celestial body after a suspected meteorite allegedly impacted her home following a mysterious sonic boom that rattled the region. The football-sized rock, now residing in her living room, is being held as evidence.

“I don’t care if it came from the asteroid belt or some alien’s backyard, it needs to take responsibility,” Finch stated, gesturing wildly at the sizable crater in her ceiling. “My insurance company said ‘acts of God,’ but this feels more like an act of cosmic negligence. Where’s the intergalactic homeowners association when you need them?”

Authorities, who have yet to officially identify the object as extraterrestrial, are reportedly baffled by Finch’s demands. “We’re not equipped to serve a subpoena on an inanimate object, especially one that may have traveled millions of miles,” explained Harris County Sheriff’s Deputy Mark Jensen. “And even if we could, who’s the defendant? The rock? The galaxy? We just don’t have the jurisdiction.”

Finch, however, remains undeterred. She has reportedly contacted several international space agencies, demanding they locate the rock’s point of origin and facilitate a formal apology. “I want to look that meteorite in its… well, whatever it has for an eye… and tell it exactly what I think of its trajectory choices,” she added, polishing the offending space debris with a damp cloth.

Her neighbor, Gerald Peterson, suggested Finch might be overreacting. “It’s a rock, Karen. A really, really fast rock.”

Finch retorted, “It’s a rock with a debt to society, Gerald.”