WASHINGTON D.C. — A long-awaited plaque honoring law enforcement officers who responded to the January 6th Capitol attack has finally been installed, years after its congressional mandate, following a breakthrough agreement on the plaque's typeface and kerning. The memorial, which sat in the Capitol basement since its completion, was reportedly held up by an exhaustive internal review process focused on achieving 'peak commemorative legibility.'

“It’s not just about putting names on a wall; it’s about conveying the gravitas of the moment,” explained Capitol Architect spokesperson, Brenda Finch, who spoke on condition of anonymity to discuss sensitive aesthetic negotiations. “We had to ensure the 'L' in 'Law Enforcement' didn't inadvertently suggest 'Losing' and that the 'O' in 'Officers' didn't look too much like a donut. These are critical design choices with lasting implications.”

The original 2022 legislation required the plaque to be installed within a year. However, according to internal documents, the project encountered significant hurdles, including a protracted debate over whether 'hero' should be capitalized, italicized, or rendered in a bold, serif font that 'truly screams heroism without being ostentatious.'

“Frankly, the initial drafts were an affront to both graphic design principles and the sacrifices made,” stated Representative Eleanor Vance (D-CA), a member of the bipartisan committee overseeing the plaque’s installation. “One proposal used Comic Sans for the officers’ names. We couldn’t possibly honor their bravery with a font typically reserved for garage sale flyers.”

The final design, featuring a tasteful Garamond for the names and a subtly embossed Trajan Pro for the title, was approved after a simple workaround: the committee agreed to disagree on several minor points, allowing installation to proceed. Insiders suggest the breakthrough came after a junior staffer pointed out the plaque was literally collecting dust next to a broken vacuum cleaner.

The plaque is now prominently displayed on the western front of the Capitol, ensuring future generations will know that while justice may be slow, bureaucratic design review is even slower.