The News, Remastered
2 satirical articles about party strategy on Hambry. Updated live.
The Party's Tripled Membership Under Zack Polanski Has Necessitated a "Strategic Pause" on Planet-Saving Initiatives to Solidify Foundational Beliefs, Sources Confirm.
The Party's New Mandatory "Aggression Quotient" Assessment Ensures Candidates Are Sufficiently Combative, Regardless of Policy.
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