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Billionaire Instantly Buys 115-Million-Year-Old Dinosaur Blood to Clone Personal Security Detail
Ventures VC Fund Pivots Entirely to Prehistoric Militia Deployment Following Successful Red Blood Cell Extraction.
Nov 3, 2026
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Found 3 articles tagged #biotechnology
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Next-Gen Human Organs Grown in Pigs Come with Zero-Sentience Guarantee
Biotech Firms Assure Investors New Animal Hosts Will Provide Vital Organs Without the Messy Complications of Personhood.
Sep 27, 2026
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Scientists Discover Omni-Microbe Capable of Solving All Human Problems, Immediately Bought by Private Equity Firm
The Revolutionary Microorganism, Which Can Generate Biofuel, Reduce Methane, and Extract Rare Earth Metals, Will Now Exclusively Optimize Shareholder Value.
Mar 30, 2026