World Leaders Exhausted After Marathon Session Of 'Strongly Urging Restraint,' Reportedly Napping
International community praised for unwavering commitment to saying 'please stop' louder and louder.
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#diplomacy
6 articles
US, Iran Agree to Disagree on Everything, Formally Codify Mutual Annoyance
Officials hail 'historic' pact to maintain optimal levels of international exasperation, ensuring job security for diplomats worldwide.
President Trump Considers 'Extreme Makeover: Iran Edition' After Talks Deemed 'Suboptimal'
Sources indicate a preference for 'decisive action' over 'boring diplomacy' as a new reality TV spin-off is reportedly in early development.
Pakistan Declares 'Open War' After Running Out of Patience, Now Accepting Applications for 'Closed War' Negotiations
Defense officials confirm the nation's patience reserves have hit critical levels, prompting a strategic shift from 'tense diplomatic scowl' to 'unambiguous conflict.'
Trump Administration Unveils 'Operation: Havana-Good-Time' to Resolve Cuban Leadership Crisis
New strategy involves 'positive vibes' and a meticulously curated playlist of American pop hits from 1987.
Iran Offers 'All-You-Can-Drill' Buffet to US Corporations, Hopes to Distract Trump with Shiny Objects
Tehran unveils 'Persian Petroleum Playtime' initiative, promising American CEOs exclusive access to 'unlimited crude and complimentary baklava.'
