WASHINGTON D.C. – Former President Donald J. Trump has unveiled a groundbreaking legislative proposal, the 'Stop All Venal Enrichment' (SAVE) Act, during a recent address, passionately urging Congress to immediately halt all personal stock trading. The move, described by sources close to the former president as 'a necessary purification of the swamp,' aims to ensure that congressional members focus solely on public service, while leaving the complex, nuanced art of national economic strategy – particularly tariffs – to a singular, divinely inspired vision.

“We need to SAVE America from these self-dealing politicians, folks,” Trump declared, according to a transcript obtained from a highly enthusiastic fan account. “They’re getting rich, and who’s paying? You are! Meanwhile, my tariffs are making us stronger than ever, believe me. No meddling with the tariffs. Those are perfect.”

The SAVE Act, which reportedly includes provisions for mandatory financial literacy courses taught by former casino magnates, has been met with a mixed, though largely bewildered, reception on Capitol Hill. Dr. Elara Finch, a Senior Analyst for the Institute for Inconvenient Truths, noted, “It’s a fascinating dichotomy. The former President simultaneously champions unfettered personal economic liberty for himself and his allies, while advocating for stringent financial asceticism for those he views as political adversaries. It’s almost as if the rules are… flexible.”

Meanwhile, Republican strategists are reportedly grappling with the former president's unwavering stance on tariffs, which continues to cause internal friction. “It’s a delicate dance,” admitted Bartholomew 'Barty' Higgins, a junior aide in the Department of Perpetual Optimism. “We’re trying to explain that some tariffs might, theoretically, hurt some industries, but also that they’re brilliant. It’s a very nuanced, 3D chess kind of argument.”