MAR-A-LAGO, FL – Former President Donald J. Trump has reportedly activated a rarely-used 'Reality Filter' protocol on Robert F. Kennedy Jr., effectively reining in the health activist's more esoteric public pronouncements ahead of the 2024 election cycle. The move comes after a period described by insiders as 'unfettered health speculation' that, while initially tolerated, has now been deemed 'strategically inconvenient.'

“Look, Bobby’s a great guy, tremendous energy, very strong on, you know, the things,” Trump stated via a late-night Truth Social post, which was then immediately deleted and replaced with an image of a bald eagle wearing a tiny MAGA hat. “But we need to focus on winning. Can’t have people thinking we’re, like, putting microchips in their organic kale. Not yet, anyway.”

Dr. Quentin Quibble, Chief Epistemological Auditor for the newly formed 'Department of Coherent Public Narratives,' confirmed the policy shift. “Mr. Kennedy’s recent assertions, while undeniably vibrant, registered an average 'Plausibility Deficit' of 87.3% on our proprietary truth-meter,” explained Dr. Quibble, adjusting his tinfoil-lined spectacles. “This exceeds the acceptable threshold for an election year, which is typically around 65% for non-incumbents.”

Local conspiracy theorist and part-time cryptid hunter, Brenda 'The Oracle' O’Malley, expressed disappointment. “They’re silencing the truth! Next, they’ll tell us the moon landing was real, or that fluoride isn’t a mind-control agent. This is just Big Pharma’s way of keeping us from knowing about the healing power of fermented lizard brains.” Experts predict Kennedy’s public statements will now undergo rigorous pre-approval by a panel of 'common sense' strategists, ensuring maximum electability and minimum alien-DNA references.