MAR-A-LAGO, FL – In a move that has left economic analysts scratching their heads and legal scholars reaching for their antacids, former President Donald J. Trump announced yesterday his unwavering commitment to closing a tax loophole on cheap imports, despite the Supreme Court’s recent invalidation of similar tariff-based legal grounds.

“They say the Supreme Court ruled against us. They say it’s ‘unconstitutional’ or ‘doesn’t exist in the tax code,’” Trump declared from a gilded podium, flanked by several large, inexplicably silent men. “But what they don’t understand is that some loopholes are so obvious, so frankly, *rude*, they don’t need to be written down. They’re just *there*.”

Dr. Fjord P. Smorgasbord, Head of Esoteric Fiscal Policy at the Institute for Unverifiable Economics, commented, “This is a fascinating development. Typically, tax loopholes are either explicitly legislated or discovered through meticulous legal interpretation. To assert the existence of a loophole based purely on a gut feeling and then attempt to close it retroactively, post-Supreme Court ruling, is… well, it’s certainly *a* strategy.”

Sources close to the former President indicated that the new approach involves a “mental blockade” against cheap foreign goods, which is expected to reduce imports by an estimated 17.3% through sheer willpower alone. “It’s about projecting fiscal strength,” explained Ms. Brenda ‘The Hammer’ Jenkins, Deputy Assistant Secretary for Incorporeal Commerce at the newly formed Department of Pure Intent. “The Supreme Court can rule on paper, but they can’t rule on the spiritual essence of a good deal.”