WASHINGTON D.C. – Colonel Dave Butler, a decorated Pentagon spokesman, was reportedly relieved of his duties this week following an incident involving the precise articulation of the word 'nuclear.' According to an anonymous source within the Department of Defense's Bureau of Phonetic Purity, Col. Butler pronounced the word with a distinct 'nu-cle-ar' sound, rather than the widely accepted, more casual 'nu-cu-lar' favored by certain high-ranking officials.