LONDON – Buckingham Palace today unveiled plans for a dedicated 'Department for Andrew Questions' (DAQ), a new governmental body tasked with cataloging, categorizing, and, eventually, not answering the increasingly complex and numerous inquiries surrounding Prince Andrew. The move comes after an internal audit revealed the volume of unanswered questions had surpassed 1.7 million, a 340% increase since last Tuesday.

“Frankly, the sheer administrative burden of not addressing these queries has become unsustainable for our existing staff,” stated Sir Reginald Ponsonby-Smythe, newly appointed Undersecretary for Proactive Non-Disclosure at DAQ. “We were losing track of which questions we hadn't answered yet, and the public deserves a consistent, albeit silent, response.”

The DAQ will operate out of a newly constructed, soundproofed annex within the Palace grounds, featuring a state-of-the-art 'Question Ingestion System' and a 'Strategic Silence Implementation Unit.' Dr. Penelope Witherbottom, a leading expert in 'Epistemological Avoidance' from the University of Greater Surrey, praised the initiative. “This is a groundbreaking step in the field of institutional obfuscation,” she commented. “By centralizing the non-response process, the Palace can achieve peak plausible deniability with unprecedented efficiency.”

Sources close to the project indicate the DAQ’s initial budget exceeds that of the Royal Mews, with projections suggesting it could soon rival the national defense budget, purely for the purpose of maintaining a dignified, impenetrable wall of silence.