WASHINGTON D.C. — A multi-year, multi-million dollar study conducted by the National Institute of Human Dynamics (NIHD) has concluded with definitive proof that human beings are, to an astonishing degree, complex. The findings, published today in the journal *Interpersonal Paradoxes*, indicate that the widely held belief that relationships are often 'tricky' or 'a bit of a mess' is scientifically sound.

“For years, we operated under the assumption that humans were essentially simple, predictable machines,” stated Dr. Evelyn Reed, lead researcher and head of the NIHD’s Department of Obvious Observations. “Our data, however, points to a startling reality: people have thoughts, feelings, and even differing viewpoints. This, as you can imagine, complicates things when they try to interact.”

The study, which involved observing thousands of live interactions ranging from family dinners to corporate meetings, found a direct correlation between an individual’s unique internal world and their propensity to, for example, misinterpret a text message or argue about the correct way to load a dishwasher. “It’s almost as if everyone has their own internal operating system, and they don’t always run compatible software,” Dr. Reed added, visibly exhausted.

Funding for the next phase of the study, which aims to determine if these 'feelings' are contagious, is currently being sought from Congress. Early projections suggest that simply telling people to 'just love each other' may not be the universally effective panacea previously imagined.