WASHINGTON D.C. – A new film, reportedly directed by the same individual responsible for 1997’s *The Fifth Element*, has apparently been released, or so claim several obscure online forums. The revelation has sent shockwaves of utter indifference across the nation, with citizens reporting no memory of its existence, much less its content or even its title.

“We’ve been monitoring the public’s engagement with new media, and this particular cinematic endeavor registered a 'cultural resonance index' of 0.00003, which is statistically indistinguishable from a forgotten grocery list,” stated Dr. Evelyn Pinter, head of the Department of Collective Unawareness at the Institute for Advanced Neglect Studies. “It’s unprecedented. Even direct-to-video sequels to obscure 80s comedies usually generate a single, confused tweet.”

Local cineplexes confirm that a movie, which may or may not be the one in question, briefly occupied a single screen in an inconveniently located corner of their complexes. “Yeah, we think we played something like that for a few days, mostly to an empty room, or maybe a room with a single, very confused pigeon,” recounted Barry 'The Usher' Jenkins, a 30-year veteran of the Grand Regal Multiplex 16. “We’ve since repurposed the screen for an extended cut of a cleaning commercial. It’s pulling better numbers.”

Authorities are urging anyone who might have accidentally seen the film to come forward, if only to confirm it was indeed a film and not a shared hallucination. The director, whose name has also mysteriously slipped from public recall, could not be reached for comment, presumably because no one remembers how to contact him.