GENEVA – Following a recent U.S. Supreme Court decision that invalidated several presidential levies, international trade organizations and multinational corporations have announced a collective decision to simply factor a 37.4% 'U.S. Inevitability Tax' into all future pricing models. The move comes as global leaders admit they are too exhausted to keep track of America's fluctuating trade policies.

“Frankly, it’s just easier this way,” stated Dr. Elara Vance, Head of Existential Supply Chain Dread at the Global Bureau of Anticipatory Economic Collapse. “We’ve run the algorithms, consulted the tea leaves, and observed the general trajectory of U.S. fiscal policy for the past decade. The data suggests that regardless of judicial oversight or basic economic principles, the impulse to slap an arbitrary surcharge on foreign goods is now an immutable law of physics, like gravity or the sudden urge for bespoke artisanal pickles.”

Manufacturers from Stuttgart to Shenzhen have begun recalibrating their cost projections, adding the new 'U.S. Inevitability Tax' as a fixed line item, nestled comfortably between 'raw materials' and 'unforeseen cosmic disruptions.'

“Our shareholders demand predictability,” explained Bjorn Svensson, CEO of Nordic Lumber & Existential Dread. “And the most predictable thing about U.S. trade now is its utter unpredictability. So, we’ve made the unpredictable predictable by just assuming the worst. It streamlines everything. We even have a new department: the 'Department of Tariff-Related Emotional Support Animals' to help our staff cope.”